Because the only way the Force can be "lost" is if life itself in the universe ended. Perhaps not even then. Life creates it. Life gives us power. Then once it dies, as I said, it becomes one with the Force.
[ words that awed him the first time he heard them. humbled him and made him feel special at once. arrogance and a sense of entitlement buried much. ]
So you see, "losing it" isn't something that can happen.
No one can make you into something you don't want to be.
[ anakin faces her, then. his expression does not change, voice remaining as even — falling into patterns established with his padawan, themselves ways he learned as a padawan from his master. ( obi-wan would remind him chihiro is not a padawan, not a youngling, not a part of the order. obi-wan isn't there. ) ]
You remember what I told you of the Jedi. How we are peacekeepers.
[ guardians of the republic and every system. a lesson prompted by innocent questions early one morning as they began their exercises. ]
Jedi fought no war. Every Jedi carries a lightsaber, but no Jedi would draw it without first attempting to negotiate.
War broke out three years ago, the scope of which the galaxy hadn't seen in a thousand years. [ he looks away from her toward his bed, to the plastipaper file containing the only information he has had on luke. adam's apple bobbing as he swallows, anakin bows. ] A peaceful resolution wasn't an option. We had to fight to protect the Republic, and we fought to bring the war to a quick end.
Other people were fighting too, to end the war. There is one senator you would have liked. She, like you, doesn't like fighting. She does everything in her power to avoid it. She would rather people listened to one another. When fighting is unavoidable, she tries to limit losses on all sides.
[ he looks to her again. ]
I can't promise you no one will be hurt. [ wryly, his smile lifting at the corner of his mouth that only just reaches his eyes, ] Not even a Jedi can see the future that clearly. But I can tell you that you if you don't want to pick up a gun, you don't have to. There is more than one way to fight.
[ not usually ways he opts for, but. they exist. ]
I used to think a lot of things weren't possible. Then I came here.
[But perhaps it's rude to follow this path all the way to its conclusion, especially when the likelihood of such a thing happening is low. ALASTAIR giveth a lot but so far it hasn't taketh away much. (Except, of course, people.)
So! Moving on--]
I appreciate the explanation, though I'm sure you've had to give it too many times thus far.
[ she isn't sure if he means now or in general, but rey realizes the the answer is the same regardless, and answers therefore with reluctant brevity. ]
[ her interactions with chewie and han had sufficiently reinforced the notion that if she were to reach out for company, it had to be done passively, silently, seizing opportunities where they arose without making a big deal about it. finn was the only person she'd ever met who could love people and reach for them so openly with such heart. she loved that about him. it was gone now, though. anakin grants her permission to reach for people like finn does, and she waffles before accepting it. ]
[ she listens to Anakin, taking in his words, his glances, the way he moves as if it all has some deeper meaning she's trying to take in. to her it does. she respects and trusts Anakin. as Master Anakin, and as Anakin, teammate, and Anakin, Jedi.
that he says there's more than one way to fight matters to her. it matters in a way that leaves her chest feeling tight, like she can't breathe, on the cusp of crying. her eyes stay dry. she breathes in, breath catching, but she doesn't shudder. she just accepts that it hurts and feels better all at once. ]
What's the senator's name?
[ that's an example that Chihiro would like to follow. she has fought for what she believes in, and she has negotiated, and she has found solutions before that didn't rely on violence. limiting losses... that's not ideal, but ideals have so little to do with this world or situation she's in now. any of the world situations she's in anymore. ]
[ anakin breathes the name almost softly, almost like a prayer. as evident is the way his expression gentles, the way a shine rarely glimpsed enters his eyes. his face transforms with just the mention of her name.
it was the most beautiful name he had ever heard when he was nine-years-old and couldn't stop himself from blurting out that he thought her an angel ( couldn't stop himself sneaking glances at her in the minutes before, so remarkable she had been. ) she only became more beautiful with time, her name music, as much the one she wore in public as the one shared secretly between the two.
he dreamt of the day he could declare it publicly. she is mine as I am hers. he dreamt. ]
[ she doesn't say anything after listening to how he says this woman's name. she just manages a nod of her head, to show she heard and is listening, and a hum somewhere in the back of her throat.
the things that come to mind, like, she has a nice name or, I think I'd like to manage to believe and live like she does are things she does not say in this moment. it doesn't quite feel right to.
she does smile, though. it's nice to see anakin in this light too, as someone who is capable of so many of the same emotions as anyone else. she doesn't really get what it means to be a Jedi, and thankfully doesn't need to, for the most part. but as someone motivated by what she feels, as someone who has saved someone she loved on the strength of that emotion, it's something she can empathize with in whatever degree.
he's managed to leave her feeling much better, less uncertain, and more convinced that it's okay to turn away from fighting as a first response. at least fighting with violence. as he says, and as she knows, there are so many other ways to fight. his words simply make it real outside of her own confused heart. ]
[ text is good, in text that actually sounds like a statement instead of a question, which it kind of is, because a) why is he asking Anakin Skywalker a favor, and b) is this even a good idea, probably not, most of his ideas tend not to be. ]
[ uh exCUSE YOU why would he need an alibi?? (he can think of at least five things at once that he'd need an alibi for. at the very least.) ]
not for an alibi, dude, for practice! PRACTICE. I need someone who has mind-affecting powers to train with and having Olivia poke around my head's not really a long-term solution.
because I'm supposed to be able to block these mental influencing things and I can't actually know if I'm blocking them or not unless someone tries them on me. and I'd rather know for sure before some Zymandis agent breaks into Oska and tries to hack into my head, you know.
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